52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks: Week 27

Week 27:

The theme for Week 27 is “Family Business.” Do you have an ancestor who ran his or her own business? What about a trade that seems to run in the family? This is a good week to write about them!

For Week 27 I am going completely off script. This week is a tribute to my cousin Eileen. I don't want to go into particulars out of respect for her and her immediate family, but this blog is giving me the much needed space to grieve someone every important to me. 

Eileen was my 1st cousin 1x removed. We were kindred spirits born 38 years apart apart. Eileen's mother Emma Casini, was my grandmother Dominish's sister.

Eileen and I bonded over family history. She found me on Facebook after a Miller family reunion was hosted one summer for my father's Miller side of the family. She explained that we were cousins and wanted to share some genealogy with me.

We would send Facebook messages and posts back and forth anytime we uncovered an old Casini family photograph or an anecdote about an ancestor that we didn't know before. She grew up with my dad and his siblings and was able to tell me stories that I had never heard before. (My dad and his siblings had a rough childhood and didn't particularly like to talk about that time in their lives). 

Eileen grew up with my grandmother Dominish, whom I never got the chance to meet. She told me things about my Nonna and Nonno that I wouldn't have known by doing a simple Ancestry.com search. She had the same passion for preserving the past that I have. 

I never got to meet Eileen in person. It's something that I am going to regret for the rest of my life. Her declining health, my full-time work schedule and slew of historical side quests made coordinating a time to meet in person difficult. I wish I would have 'bit the bullet', cleared my schedule and had the chance to sit down with her, even for a few hours. I think that's why I feel the need to write this blog. I know without a shadow of a doubt that Eileen knew she was in my daily prayers and that I loved her, but I wish I could have told her in person. Grieving is for those of us that are still here on Earth, left behind. We have to reconcile the could have, should have, would haves and continue living our lives and honoring those who has passed. 

When you lose someone like Eileen, the 'keeper of the family history', you lose so much more than a friend or a cousin. We've lost countless stories and memories that no one else can tell. Thankfully she has left a lot of genealogy research behind for me to build on. 

As a practicing Catholic, I firmly believe that Eileen is in heaven, at peace, and no longer in pain. She was stricken by what I call the 'Casini curse', the Big C... cancer. Every direct descendant of the Casini family has had cancer at one point in their lives (sometimes multiple reoccurrences). It hasn't always been the cause of death for my relatives, but so far it seems like no one with the Casini DNA has been able to escape cancer in one form or another. 

To end this blog post... Hug your friends and family. Tell them you love them. Be demonstrative and obnoxious about how appreciative you are of the special people in your life. Write down the stories. Take the pictures (and accurately label them!), keep the scrapbook, and attend the family reunions. 

Today is also the second anniversary of the passing of my Uncle Steve* Stevens. May his and Eileen's memories always be a blessing. 

*(Not his real first name, but I literally didn't know that until I read his obituary! He'll always be Uncle Steve to me).